Prospecting SCRIPT | Initial Call STEP 3/YES

STEP 3 |Initial Call…if YES

Expert/Trainer takes notes on their answers during this call.

As call is progressing from STEP 2 to STEP 3, Trainee loads up the seacretapp.com for the Founders Video or whatever video is relevant.

If YES:

Sweet! Do you have a few more minutes right now? Wait for permission to proceed. If not, set a time in the next 24-hours to continue. Any longer than that, and you need to re-introduce them to the concept by beginning STEP 2 again.

(Trainee) is going to send you a quick video (about whatever they said was their top interest)…it’s coming from Space so be patient with technology.

As you watch the video, wear two hats:

  • First, in the context of a sidehustle…you’ll glimpse how powerful this is and why (trainee) and I are so excited to share it with you, and
  • Second, as a Customer or Influencer – these people generally want to do the best for their body and for those they are closest to…maybe they want special VIP pricing…or even to fill their own stocking, or share with a few people and get their personal products for FREE or half price.

Did you get the link? Wait for response. Okay, click it now…we’ll stay on the phone. Or if they have to get off the phone (sometimes the audio won’t play if they’re on a call). If you hang up, tell them to watch it now and you’ll call them back in 30 seconds more than the length of the video.

That was great, wasn’t it (name)! Wait for response, allow them to talk if they begin telling you anything…

What did you like the best? (Whatever they say…reply with) Me too!! Based on what you know so far, is there any reason we can’t get together with you – or you and a friend or two – it really won’t take very long, say 15-20 minutes to play in the Mud and help (trainee) off on the right foot.

When is the closest time to right now we can get together? Wait for response.

Okay, you’ll get an email from (trainee) confirming a few things:

  • first, confirming our visit (repeat time and location verbally)
  • second, another short video about the (whatever else they were most interested in).

So (name) what’s the best email or text to reach you at? Pause while they confirm their contact info.

Alright, one more question in closing…and I can appreciate this is coming out of left field so it might be something you haven’t thought about lately, or even at all…but (name) what would you like MORE of in your life, and perhaps more importantly, what would you like a little bit LESS of?

This is where *THEY TELL YOU* the reasons they need a #sidehustle! WRITE DOWN THEIR ANSWERS!! 

Practice active listening…ask questions, repeat highlights back to them, guide them along, this is likely the first time they’ve been asked to dream in a very long time…dig deeper into their responses…paint them into the bigger picture. Stretch their vision.

More Time:

How much more time would you like? What would you do with more time? How would that change your priorities? What else?  What else?  What else?

More Money:

What would you do with more money? Why is that important to you? Economically speaking, what does that look like for you? What else?  What else?  What else?

Travel / Vacations / Freedom

Where would you go?  Why? How would you get there?  Drive? Fly? Cruise? Who are you with? What would you do there? Experience the culture, physical exploration, or enjoy the breeze while chillaxing in a hammock? If you’re sitting outside, what are you eating? What time of year is it? What does it smell like? What are you wearing? What else?  What else?  What else?

So if I’m hearing you correctly…you’ve basically thrown your alarm clock at your boss and (repeat their story back to them). Did I get that right (name)?

Alright, WOW, that’s powerful, thank you so much for sharing! Between now and when we meet, go ahead and continue visualizing what you really want your life to look like…I’ll ask you about it when we meet, that way, I can be sure to focus our chat around what’s truly important to you, sound good (name)!?

(Name) you’re so enthusiastic…I’m really excited to meet you! So you know, I take my appointments very seriously…you have my word that I’ll be prepared and on time, and you’ll have my full, undivided attention! If something comes up on your end, I’m sure I can count on you to let (trainee) know ahead of time, right! Great.

Thanks again (name), if I can add value to your life in any way between now and when we visit next, you can call me at 403.606.7917.

Have a happy day!!

Prospecting Script | Initial Call STEP 3/NO

STEP 3 |Initial Call…if No

If NO:

Well (name), thank you for taking the time to chat with us today. Would it be alright with you if (trainee) keeps you posted, you know progress wise – we’re lucky to have such a team player…catching on quick and adding so much value to our SQUAD! (Trainee) will send you a link for SQUAD282 so you can follow along with the exciting things we are crossing off our bucket lists. Was there anything else from our explanation that caught your interest? Wait for response.

It would really help (trainee) if you could keep an ear open as you go about your daily life…be the friend that does the recon – here’s the low-down of what to look for:

If you hear anyone making comments like ‘Ugh, I wish I had more time, or (pause) I wish I had more money, or (pause) maybe even droning on about how badly they need a vacation or want to get back in shape.

Here’s another key to watch for, and I get this one a lot…if you run into anyone with (pause), you know (pause), hair – we’ve got a brush – the only one on the planet that detangles PAINLESSLY. Or (pause) anyone with skin (pause, just long enough to be slightly awkward)………or wrinkles……..…(pause), but seriously, our products are Paraben free, never tested on animals and contain the healing powers of The Dead Sea…so from the babies with diaper rash and the old ladies with wrinkles…them and everyone in between will be grateful when you introduce them to (trainee).

Oh yeah, and lastly just a heads up…the next time you see (trainee), you’ll most likely notice some pretty spectacular changes…so I’m letting you know in advance it’s okay to reach out and ask for more info whenever you change your mind.

Thank you again for your time (name), if I can add value to your life in any way, you can call me at 403.606.7917.

Have a happy day!!

Prospecting Scripts | Initial Call STEP 2

STEP 2 |Expert Leads the Conversation

JEN:

Hi (name), thanks for making time and being a good friend. It’s important to respect your time so I’ll get right to it…

Have you ever recommended a movie? Wait for response. Right, we all have. But have you ever recommended a movie before seeing the trailer (pause)? Kinda difficult, right! Because if you didn’t watch the trailer, how would you even know if you liked it enough to recommend it in the first place…you with me! Wait for response. What we’re doing today is exactly the same thing.

We’ve discovered a very unique and special company called SEACRET, based on Dead Sea Minerals, Salt and Mud – and since pretty much everybody likes to play in the Mud, we would like to share the unique trifecta of things that make this #sidehustle so appealing.

While we chat today, if you see value, there’s a few things you could do to help (trainee)  – don’t worry, we’re not asking you to lay down your credit card, we’re simply looking for feedback!

We appreciate your help gaining exposure for (trainee). Because the Dead Sea has unique healing properties, it’s almost certain that you’ll come across someone who will need to talk to (trainee). Fair enough? Wait for response. 

If you see value in what we talk about today, consider who you might know, even yourself maybe, that would benefit by becoming a Customer, or might like to join us on this adventure as a SEACRET Agent. Remember, totally chill…no pressure, you cool with that? Wait for response. 

Perfect, so, would it be alright with you if I tell you a few stories as I explain what we’ve discovered? Wait for response.

Excellent, let’s jump into it: As you’ve likely noticed, our economy has gone through some interesting flux the last few years…many people are securing their families and their futures with a Plan B – because you just never know, and why would you risk the uncertainty?

First, geographically speaking, it’s all based around the lowest point on earth – the Dead Sea – which sits thirteen-hundred-and-eighty-eight feet below sea level. For over 5,000 years, this magical body of water and the 26 Minerals within, have been renowned around the world for unique healing benefits. Many call it the 8th Wonder of the World.

Cleopatra cited The Dead Sea waters as her source for beauty and rejuvenation, she would often travel two months by camel to get there, and since she was known for her beauty, it’s obvious that it worked! She might not have understood the science, but she understood that she felt and looked great. It was her Fountain of Youth…

What sets us apart is our exclusive distribution rights to the Salt, Mud and Minerals from the Dead Sea. And what makes it so special, is that it works…immediate results that truly WOW!! Great for relief of skin challenges such as Eczema, Rosacea, Psoriasis and Acne.

Secondly, the science. As you probably know, skin is our largest organ, and as such, all sorts of things affect the appearance and health of our skin…including our diet and exercise (or the lack thereof *giggle*), the environment, stress, and even a lack of sleep.

We’ve discovered many people who are challenged with skin issues such as Eczema, Psoriasis, Rosacea and Acne. Babies aren’t immune either, they get diaper rash and sometimes Eczema from our dry climate. Skin conditions including dry skin or cracked heels doesn’t just affect adults – kids struggle with it too. We’re all prone to under eye dark circles and puffiness…and those darn wrinkles…they don’t care if you’re a man or a woman, or what you’re doing in life. Do you know anybody with these types of skin struggles? Wait for response. Allow them to elaborate if they begin telling you who they know.

All things being equal, we realized skin health isn’t so much a GIRLY thing, but rather, a HUMAN thing, and we got fired up about the potential based on the gender-neutral appeal of this product and this business. Makes sense, right? Wait for response.

Third, economies of scale. The typical North American spends, on average, $1,000 per year on personal care products. People might scale back on entertainment or eating out, but have you ever heard of someone opting out of shampoo…or soap? *giggle*. Wait for response. Me neither.

Our focus is more of a Wellness project – skin health and now nutrition…we’re creating a well-thy community of SEACRET Agents (pause) I know, it’s both awesome and cheesy, but being called a SEACRET Agent is way better than what I used to be called (pause) ‘Manager’…boo (ENTER: frowney face emoji), or what my kids call me, taxi, wallet…just kidding, I love it.

You with me so far? Wait for response.

Perfect, so to dig a little deeper…beginning in 2005, SEACRET sold over a billion dollars in 900+ retail locations across 44 countries. You know it must be a phenomenal product with that kind of success from a kiosk in malls and airports (aka the most hostile retail environment) – arguably THE hardest way to sell anything, ever…right! Wait for response.

During that time, we partnered with one of the World’s largest and most respected manufacturers – have you heard of L’Oreal? (pause) They’re a giant…they own over 500 companies, and when they announced they were going to buy us, our CEO declined their offer because – as he puts it – this is a family business and we’re building SEACRET as a community, for the community – and it is his vision, his work ethic and his determination that gets us all fired up.

Fast forward a few years…we agreed to partner with L’Oreal, so even though they don’t own us, they manufacture our products and we are the only company with the rights to manufacture directly on the shores of the Dead Sea! It’s a pretty exciting partnership, because together, we’ve combined the best of science and nature to develop and patent some of the most advanced and clinically proven wellness technologies available.

By 2012 there was a strong shift in how consumers acquired products and services. Companies like Facebook and NETFLIX were disrupting every market and changing the face of commerce. Online virtually abolished ‘window shopping’, instead, someone snapped a pic of their lunch and all of a sudden that restaurant is a booming success. SEACRET recognized this Social Economy Revolution and transitioned into relationship marketing.

In the last few years, many retail locations have closed – flagship stores like Blockbuster (remember them?), SEARS, Barns and Noble, Blacks Photography, Radio Shack, and Toys R’ Us…sadly, I could go on and on. You know the world is changing when more than 700 McDonald’s locations have closed down.

Recently, companies like Amazon, eBay and Apple.com have dominated…click-and-order has demolished the brick-and-mortar business model. Airbnb is the largest supplier of hotel rooms, yet they don’t own even a single room. Uber essentially took over the taxi industry, yet they don’t own any vehicles. The economy is changing and if you don’t keep up, you get left behind.

Today, the skin care industry represents a two-hundred-and-sixteen-billion-dollar a year business. Perhaps more impressive, is that experts project that number will soar during the next two years or so, to north of four-hundred-billion-dollars (pause) per year!! Did you know skin care was such a mammoth industry? Wait for response.

To summarize…after pivoting to relationship marketing, SEACRET has successfully launched in seven countries around the world during the last seven years…and we’re growing! Because of the healing properties, we aren’t selling skin care, but rather servicing our customers by introducing them to a relief solution for common skin concerns and becoming Servant leaders to others who want to share SEACRET as well.

When we connected the dots and put this trifecta together, we began to get excited. Then, as discovered that 62% of our workforce is men we got really excited, because that proved this is a viable Plan B (and for some a Plan A) for ALL of the people we know; equal opportunity for men and women, regardless of previous experience, geographic location, warm market or free time. This is a sidehustle we can talk to our kids about at the dinner table and we’re very proud to be redefining the market by doing things differently.

Many of our SEACRET Agents are getting paid every week, sometimes every day, by helping others share with our franchise-like-business-system! Pretty good space to be in for a sidehustle, wouldn’t you agree? Wait for response. Could you handle getting paid every day? Wait for response.

That’s why (trainee) was very excited to call you today, to see if it would be alright with you if we shared some information about this wellness project in person over the next couple of days? Wait for response. If it works for you, either now, soon, or in the future, you can help by gathering an audience either in person or online to experience some of (trainee’s) favourite products. 

Now allow me to ask – what piqued your interest the most? Supporting (trainee) by becoming a VIP Customer or hosting an experience as an Influencer to earn your products free and half price? Perhaps being supported in your own #sidehustle and becoming a SEACRET Agent? Can we get you some more information? Wait for response.

Prospecting Script| Invite call STEP 1

After 15-years of trial and error in the profession of Network or Relationship Marketing, Jen Conrad has blueprinted the invite call. Study this. Share it with your teams. Have explosive success.

Thanks for being a #changeagent and helping us redefine the industry. We’d love it if you tell us what worked best for you, so leave your testimonial so we can share the love.

The Buddy System

Introducing your Seacret #sidehustle on behalf of your new Agent, the desired outcome is to get approval to discuss further. We are collecting decisions – simply sorting people from their prospect list – into Yes, tell me more or No thank you, not at this time. If they say No, they are saying No to the trainer, not to the new Agent. Holding hands through this initial process eliminates new Agents from ‘machine-gunning’ their warm market, and from them losing momentum if their friends and family don’t respond well to their initial ask.

There is science behind all of the ‘Wait for Response’ parts. You are collecting Yes’s along the way, which subconsciously makes it easy for the prospect to agree when you ask them for the close.

To show your new Agent immediate success, we make calls together for a few reasons:

1. The expert has better posture and is better able to communicate effectively.  Likely, the Expert won’t get dissuaded by a little push back from the prospect, whereas the trainee might panic and hang up immediately before completing the ask.

2. To control the conversation, and the impression prospects are getting about our brand, as well as the industry overall.

3. Demonstrating how the support system works to illustrate for potential new Agents that they don’t have to do it alone. If they want to join us they can expect the same level of assistance.

4. If the prospect has industry experience, our different system will become immediately apparent, and might be attractive as a viable #sidehustle for them.

STEP 1 | Trainee initiates the phone call

Either sitting together or being already connected on a 3-way call, the trainee makes the dial *no small talk* and begins like this:

TRAINEE:

Hi (name), it’s (trainee), I know it’s been a while and we’re due for a good catch-up…but before we do that, I’m hoping you will help me out with something. I’m working a few hours a week – kind of a sidehustle – with my friend Jen. She’s here with me now actually, and we’ve been wanting to test something out – I’d really appreciate your wisdom and feedback…do you have a few minutes to chat? Wait for response.

You’re awesome…thank you. I’m excited for you guys to chat…just quickly so you’re not complete strangers, I’ve mentioned to her a few of my favourite things about you and likewise, Jen is helping me understand the importance of, and how to substantiate a Plan B in this economy. I know she knows what she’s talking about because for the last 16-years – instead of working all day like I’ve been – she chooses to spend most of her time helping people like me, earn as they learn with the system she’s created. I respect her as a leader and trainer, and she’s got a unique perspective which showed me I was looking for a mindset – in fact, a community – not simply an opportunity.

So…Jen this is (friends name), (friends name) this is Jen.

*Trainee REMAINS MUTED and SILENT for remainder of the call.*

[audible gasp] | MKE Year 3 Week 24

Would it be alright with you if I ask you a question? Are the peptides that tell our brains to produce collagen – our Fountain of Youth – the same peptides (or similar?) that wire our brains and determine if we associate positive or negative emotions to situations?

Is that why happy people look so young? enter [audible gasp]…

Perhaps working well under pressure is simply another way of glorifying the habit of procrastination. Actually, that’s exactly what that is…and what its not is something to be celebrated. It’s a bad habit and as Og Mandino reminds us, we are slaves to our habits.

The good news?

We can CHOOSE which habits to become slaves to!

Except that we often don’t.

Until I knew that the subconscious mind makes all the decisions, I didn’t know it was less than ideal to simply ‘go with the flow’, or that I was actually addicted to the ignorance?!

Procrastination perpetuates the addiction because thriving from the RUSH of being rushed, literally causes a chemical reaction in my brain. For me, completing tasks in a nearly-impossible time frame was a rush. And a super bad habit. One that wasn’t serving me.

Working well under pressure is simply secret code for an addiction to the peptides we repeatedly attached to feelings.

Continue reading “[audible gasp] | MKE Year 3 Week 24”

Because Science, that’s why! | MKE Year 3 Week 23

I was at the doctor the other day, undergoing a battery of standard [read: boring] tests for my memory and cognitive capacity. I’m talking about 2-full days of mind-numbingly boring tests, yet when the doctors asked how I was doing – my answer was consistently “Great!” or “That’s the most fun I’ve had all day!”. Sincerely.

 

In my life and around my home, I’ve talked a lot about being HAPPY, always. Being positive and agreeable and easy to be around…perhaps it’s because my ColorCode is pretty evenly split between White/Yellow/Blue…meaning I have quite an agreeable personality…doesn’t mean I’m a Yes-Man…means I’m easy to get along with, and subsequently, get along with nearly everyone pretty easily as well.

Continue reading “Because Science, that’s why! | MKE Year 3 Week 23”

Powerful Beyond Measure | MKE Year 3 Week 22

I know I can have whatever I want. In order to set aside my past habits and thought patterns – which have only proven to produce only what I do not want – I must first learn to visualize what I DO want.

If nothing changes, nothing changes.

Sadly, many people stop doing great work (either consciously or unconsciously) because they know they’re powerful beyond measure – and that’s a truth which often scares even the bravest among us. Marianne Williamson was right…it is out light, not our darkness which scares us the most.

It's who you think you're not that holds you back

before I can bring about change in my physical life, first, I need to learn how to count on myself. I’ll do the thing when push comes to shove…but I need to learn how to do it before I’m backed into a corner, or up against a deadline. I’ve proven my abilities…to earn income, keep a house in a nice, safe neighbourhood. Have kids who want for nothing. Be the best hockey-mom. etc. Even for myself, my ability to create is solid. Follow-up ability is haphazard. Doing something for myself…still struggling, big time. I’ll do it for anyone else,..just not used to making ‘me’ a priority.

Looking for the answers ‘outside’ your true self is nothing more than running from your own greatness. As I write this, I am overcome with guilt as I have been doing just that – running from my own greatness, keeping both my Good, and my Great, under wraps. Liken it to a wick-less firecracker – lying dormant until suddenly it is exposed to one tiny flame…except I’m stubborn so I needed a full-on cataclysmic event to ignite the firecracker inside me. Because honestly, Marianne Williamson had it right – it does scare me.

It’s all too easy to fall into the trap of mindlessly regurgitated language. When speakers gravitate toward any one of these AWESOME (or similar) adjectives to describe the world around them, it’s time to visit the thesaurus for a few peppery alternatives. Selecting unique adjectives demonstrates more original thinking. The same holds true for my ‘fan club’…those who cheer me on towards my own greatness. I do not simply want a mindless claque (defined as: a band of people hired to applaud an act or persons), I want to inspire people; to move them at the core of who they truly are, to help steer their return to innocence.

With the help and encouragement through MKE, I’ve realized I cannot possibly serve other people unless I serve myself first. In order to realize my true purpose and live my calling, I first need to treat myself as my first project…I must love myself enough to put as much focus on me as I would on anyone else.

In my MKE18 LOVE blog, I repeated the known fact that with love all things are possible. If LOVE is all we need to do, then LOVE is also all we need to know. Therefore, by focusing on LOVE by helping others get what they want, it’s a Universal law that by default, we will also get everything we ever wanted. We don’t have to believe in Gravity to know its a thing…LOVE is the same way. All we have to do is trust in LOVE as much as we trust in gravity.

Be your own gravity.

Trust. It’s already inside you.

Love, Jen

Broadcasts Of Our Soul | MKE Year 3 Week 21

Our greatest barriers are the conflict within our own minds. Peace and abundance is first found in the heart of the individual, and the Law of Attraction brings back to us what we put out to the Universe.

I am very blessed and highly favoured – thinking good thoughts, finding the silver linking, having a HAPPY day, always. To master self-control and self-governance I will myself forward with positivity.

during Week 5 of the Master Key System, we were reminded that power is contingent upon the proper use of the power within us; therefore I cannot grow bigger until I embrace what I have already created and share with the world my personal credo along with the cornerstones upon which it is built. Applying my ‘happy’ filter to every experience allows me to respond, rather than react to situations.

While I cannot control what happens around me I can control how I respond to it. 

Calming my breath.

Calming my heart rate.

Calming my mind.

I am smart enough to know my own mind. I know I can control it and I KNOW I can create a different reality. My thinking has and will continue to catapult me towards my own greatness.

I am Brave. Selfless. Intelligent. Empathetic. Honest. Kind. Divergent. This is my frequency – my souls’ broadcast. 

want more?

 

What frequency do you resonate at? If you feel like you’re always getting the short end of the stick, it’s time for some serious introspection! Adjust your frequency. The stuff that’s been holding you back – let it go! Your life is worth more than your excuses. Be stronger than your circumstance. Be brave.

Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we deal with it.

True story…we create our realities – the good, the bad, and the ugly. Reality, therefore is literally an illusion. If we can create our own realities…why don’t we? For most of us, the root of the problem lies in that we don’t believe in ourselves.

You believed in Santa for like eight years, yet you find it hard to believe in yourself for five minutes?

Somewhere along the way we accepted and applied some form of unconscious self-sabotage…we absorbed ‘lack consciousness’ and limiting beliefs.

…feelings of unworthiness or inadequacy silently consume our soul…

…the lack of self-confidence to pursue our dreams cripples us…

…congested mental bandwidth prohibits dreaming because our frequency is so clogged with relics from the past…

Unknowingly holding them as truths, these subconscious shackles lock us to events, circumstance or people, and because we repeatedly and incorrectly attribute these external factors as though they are the same as ‘who we are’ – and soon we begin to buy what we’re selling regarding lack consciousness – eventually and without fail bringing into our reality that which we don’t want – our reality becomes one of lack instead of the light that is our birthright. Somewhere along the way we become convinced that we’ll ‘get what’s coming to us’ and it seems to be human nature to automatically associate a negative connotation to that sentence. Why do we do that? What if we believe we deserve greatness and expect it to descend upon us in all we do…the world would be such a different place.

lobsters of spreading our wings, we allow society to clip them – we tighten ourselves up emotionally and physically… which drastically constricts the Universal flow of peace we so eagerly want and need.

Deliberate use of the current of manifestation ignites sweet restoration of self, and in turn it consequently and successfully activates peace, prosperity and abundance within the family, home and ultimately, the planet.

Reversing the polarity of limiting belief thought-forms can help free your mind and your soul. Imagine with me for a few moments if you will…

Imagine you have a lot more money than you do right now. How would that transform your own life and the lives of those closest to you?

Imagine you could attract increased wealth – simply by removing the internal blockade thats been keeping you from your Abundance. How would this change your world?

Imagine you could immediately pinpoint your sense of Purpose, and in doing so, begin living your most empowered life. Would this re-awakening of your Spirit invigorate you? Would you live your life differently? What does ‘living on purpose’ look like for you?

The truth is, these are not fantasies for you to imagine, rather realities waiting to happen. YOUR realities. All you have to do is learn to control your own frequency! Exciting stuff, isn’t it!! When you control your frequency, your actions, belief and overall persona will guide your life.

Controlling your frequency – your vibration – is key.

If you send out crazy vibes, crazy vibes is what you’ll get back.

If you send out abundance vibes, abundance vibes are what you’ll get.

Well done is better than well said

The Law of Life

Whatever you give away today or think or say or do, will multiply about tenfold and then return to you.

It may not come immediately, nor from the obvious source, but the LAW applies unfailingly through some invisible force.

Whatever you feel about another, be it love or hate or passion, will surely bounce right back to you in some clear or secret fashion.

If you speak about some person a word of praise or two, soon tens of other people will speak kind words to you.

Our thoughts are broadcasts of our soul, not secrets of the brain, kind ones of happiness, pretty ones; untold pain.

Given works as surely as reflections in the mirror, if hate you send, hate you’ll get back, but loving bring love nearer.

Remember, as you start this day, and duty crowds your mind, that kindness comes so quickly back, to those who first are kind!

Le that thought and this one direct you through each day…The only things we ever keep are the things we give away!

-Jerry Buchanan

However, once you begin to shift your Mindset, your entire experience of this existence begins to change…you become Unstoppable. You start to feel freer in every way. As physical and emotional barriers dissolve new avenues of income and opportunity appear as if by divine intervention without any effort on your part…the natural process of you reconnecting with the Universal State of Flow. Improving your mindset will improve your life by bringing awareness to the Mind / Body / Spirit / Universal Flow connection.

 

Go ahead – uncover and transform self-imposed limits and redefine and reinvent yourself. Eliminate fear and lack and replace them with self-acceptance and love. Focus on your transformation, surrender to the challenge and let it guide you.

Learn to forgive and heal the past.

Expand your capacity to give and receive.

Embrace gratitude. For everything. All the time.

Starting right now let this be the year that changes everything! Let today be your New Year…there’s still 365 days regardless of how you slice the cake…decide that today instead of ‘one day’ decide that today will be your new ‘day one’.

Be COURAGEOUS…You’ve got this!!

Let me know what you’re going to let go of and what you’re going to focus on so I can cheer you on as well. YES YOU CAN!!

Love, Jen

The Incandescent Lightbulb Experiment | MKE Year 3 Week 20

Thomas Edison found 10,000 different ways to successfully fail at creating the incandescent lightbulb before one day he discovered the only right way. I wish Humanity still had that kind of resolve.

Think about this…

…what if Thomas Edison stopped after only 15 tries??

[Who knows, Humanity may have reverted back to knuckle dragging and grunting.]

Now imagine…

…what if you are to the world what Edison was to the lightbulb?!?

A good rule of thumb is this: whatever you default to when you’re procrastinating is a giant clue as to where your interests and passions lie. When you honour your true calling you’ll love what you do, and as a reward for your intelligence and resolve, you too will never work another day in your life!

[Interestingly enough, if I’m avoiding doing erroneous chores or things I dread such as filing my taxes or cleaning toilets, I turn to writing.]

If you knew you were making a difference and touching lives would you continue to sell yourself short and admit defeat so easily?

I’ve been consciously observing people for nearly two decades and realized that possessing the fortitude to sink our teeth into a project and stick with it until completion is a dying art. Resolve as a virtue has dwindled down to a barely discernible remnant of Edison’s commendable stick-to-it-attitude. More often than not, peoples’ default setting these days is to err on the side of caution. Many seek – and sadly find – acceptance within a depressing yet overly common tie…at one point or another they’ve all given up their hopes and dreams, currently settling for (or will soon settle for) a life of mediocrity.

Being realistic is the most commonly travelled road to mediocrity.

We tell ourselves stories that we wouldn’t have been good at it anyways, loser. It typically goes down something like this (strewn with self-loathing and cynicism):

  • With a fits-and-starts approach, we ‘trysomething a few times putting in minimal efforts, not willing to commit the time to mastering our craft – yet are flabbergasted when these mystical half-assed efforts don’t bring us overnight success. Must be the industries fault.
  • Our belief and desire in the project – and in ourself – dissipates at an alarming rate, and in the wake of the proverbial ‘throwing in of the towel’ our friends and family write us off as a failure – hurling ‘I-told-you-so’ insults behind our backs and to our face (is one really worse than the other??).
  • This one-two punch is quickly and surely followed by a looming loss of confidence in ourselves; leading to a deep-rooted belief that we are indeed a failure. Who am I to have a better life. I don’t deserve it. 
  • Blinded by our own neurosis, we begin feverishly shifting our energies from betterment into self-loathing; beating ourselves up both emotionally and subconsciously. Perhaps even physically. What a stupid idea. Certainly won’t be trying that ever again. 
  • The torment deepens as we avoid working on ourselves, focusing instead on imaginary grandeur to substantiate how ‘busy’ we are. Ignoring our misplaced priorities in order to poke fun at the ridiculousness of ever having thought stepping out of our box was a viable option in the first place. Honestly, I should be more realistic. This is as good as it gets for me.
  • Enter various forms of self-sabotage [This is not an action plan, nor an escape, it is a cry for help] such as (over eating, over thinking, over drinking, partying, staying up too late, negative self-talk etc.). All in a wayward attempt to camouflage the underlying issue – that we simply don’t LOVE ourselves enough to persevere.
    • Instead, we justify our failures by convincing ourselves that it’s okay to give up on our dreams. *Enter random excuse of how the actions (or inaction) of someone else has doomed your life for all eternity [eye roll]*.
  • Crawling into a pit of despair – your only goal in life is to hide out wearing your fat pants and binge watch Schitt’s Creek on Netflix with the necessities: a comfy blanket, a bag of coke bottle candies and a big bowl of yesterday’s popcorn. Nothing like diving in to whatever crisis the Media has fabricated for us to drown our own sorrows. Anything to take the spotlight off our own misery and despair.
    • Netflix binging is a sure-fire gateway – always ending in an awkward and uncomfortable sofa-snooze-fest [complete with drool, most probably].
    • Following this Euphoria, you are rudely awakened by a sharp, unpleasant and equally predictable jolt as you are once again reunited with the fact that you have a body. Dazed and confused, you question if it’s even humanly possible to unfold yourself from the bizarre position and begin to gain certainty that you’ll likely have to accept that you shall indeed remain in this pretzel-like form for the rest of all time.
    • These nonsensical thoughts are derailed by more nonsense as you question *like, legit* if your head is still attached to our body because you can’t tell given the bizarre angle of your neck. That’s great. Just great.
  • The next day hits you like a tonne of bricks! Yet you remain ignorant to the factors that continue to land you in this same.exact.situation.
    • An unending orchestra of random, snarky remarks rattle around among the brain fog…Somewhere in all that chaos and drama you manage to justify actual jealousy of sharks with laser beams attached to their heads, and ponder your exempt status as it relates to the sign in the fridge that reads ‘Don’t eat this – it is not your food’ – surely it can’t apply to you – after all, you didn’t have time to pack a lunch.
  • You spend the rest of the day a slave to the unruly headache plaguing your existence.
    • You’re basically a Zombie by the time you *finally* get home. Instead of having a nice family dinner and helping kids with their homework, you grab drive thru and float in and out of consciousness while the kids eat in front of the TV and stuff sandwiches into the VCR.  You muster every ounce of strength you’ve got left and crawl into bed at 7:42pm with your clothes still on because you’ve lost your will to give a shit.

We make excuses and play the blame game to avoid the necessary self-work that must inherently be present prior to changing our circumstance.

Don’t let the giants of fear and failure stare down at you and cause paralysis. Crush your fear. Don’t let your fear crush you.

Subconsciously these excuses begin (or continue) to berate our self-worth – feelings of inadequacy consume us, and our internal self-dialogue convinces us we simply didn’t deserve happiness.

Here are a few examples – some of which may seem (all too?) familiar:

…if we applied for a new position – we justify how it wouldn’t have been a good fit because of *enter random employee’s name and identify their annoying habit*…

…if we applied with a new company – we sell ourselves some nonsense about it being a farther drive and then all of a sudden we’re super relieved about all the extra time we won’t have to spend in traffic…

…if we had ventured into Network Marketing – we chalk it up to the industry being no good; and because those things don’t work anyways…

 

At the end of the day, we cannot escape the harsh reality that we didn’t really ‘try’ that hard at all. We kicked a can around a few times – taking a few steps forward – usually followed by a uncomfortable and immediate retreat back into our comfort zone.

It’s as if our ambition has been squelched…taking our creative intelligence and work ethic along with it.

Comfort zones aren’t usually very comfortable. Comfort now ensures long-term discomfort. Whereas discomfort now yields long-term comfort. Ironically.

Armed with these powerful reminders, we can now shift our focus to a handful of delightful truths that are naturally weighted in our favor when we honour the Laws of the Universe:

1. You can’t develop balance while you’re already balanced… balance is actually developed while you’re falling. Therefore, failure makes us stronger – it teaches us how to develop balance.

Try standing like a Flamingo … you can’t get into that pose until you’re balanced, and you can’t hold that pose unless you’re balanced. One of those strange but true Universal Laws.

2. Cheer everyone on. All the time. Regardless.

Have you ever noticed how many times a baby falls down while attempting to walk? They fall down all the time, but they always get back up again. Falling makes them stronger too!

P&G nailed it with this Olympics video – watch these babies learning to walk

We don’t deem toddlers a failure when they fall ten thousand times while learning to walk. We don’t demean them for how many falls it took before they got it. We don’t laugh at them for trying again. No, that would make us savages.

Since we can muster joy and support for a child, why can’t we find within us the compassion and empathy to do exactly the same thing for a friend or co-worker, or better still, for ourselves?

Heck, we practically throw them a parade – cheering happy thoughts of love and support from the sidelines. Showering them with praise and accolades – assuring them they can do it because we believe they can! And when they finally reach our outstretched arms we love all over them with lots and lots of kisses, naturally!

It is completely normal to applaud the walkers for their resolve and ambition. Yet we are cynical and unsupportive of any adult who exhibits those same traits? Where does that excitement go? How do our cheers turn so quickly into daggers? We are like crabs in a bucket. Shame on us as a civilization. Don’t be that ‘friend’. Rise above it and be the light in someone’s life.

3. Proceed with caution when telling yourself stories. We must think happy thoughts.

This applies to the stories you tell other people about yourself, as well as what you say silently to yourself.

4. It is acceptable necessary to quit feeling bad, silly or guilty for pouring yourself into two, or five (or even 30) different ideas with the intention of moving your life forward.

You probably don’t beat yourself up about having multiple pairs of shoes, right?? Of course not, that would be ridiculous! So why do we think less of ourselves if we try out a bunch of different interests; pursue various hobbies; and/or bust it at a day job while building a #sidehustle in our down time??

4.1. Keep trying until you find the right fit. Like shoes:

In general, us ladies have at least a few pairs of flats (casual/work/on the town versions – in a variety of colors), flip flops (…c’mon they take up like zero space in the closet so three pairs really only counts as 1 actual pair of shoes!), high heels and pumps, ankle boots – flat and high heeled versions, slippers, winter boots (not to be confused with the walking-the-dogs-in-the-winter’ boots) and at least one slightly bedazzled pair – maybe even with a kitten heel.  You’re almost weird if you don’t.

For the guys out there, you’ve probably got brown work shoes and black ones too, a comfy pair of flips, the comfy slip-ons that you’re not allowed to wear in public (reserved for cutting the grass and late-night milk runs), converse – in a few colors because they’re cool, at least one pair of presentable running shoes, maybe even some cowboy boots shit kickers, maybe even a pair of shower shoes – if you’re into that kind of thing.

5. We know from Malcolm Gladwell’s ‘Outliers’ that it takes approximately 10,000 hours to become a master at anything.

In regards to personal development and becoming your best and brightest self, you don’t need to invest all the hours in one place. Similarly, you don’t need to work at the same task, in the same chair, for the same company for 20 consecutive years to develop work experience.

You only need to put in the time and keep learning. Keep practicing. Keep failing forward. Focus on activity, not results.

Whether your current endeavour is your first, fifth or seventeenth attempt to secure your own legacy, I applaud you for pursuing your own greatness and getting your Edison on!

You are enough. The world needs YOU to shine!

Watch one of my favourite movie clips: Facing The Giants | Death Crawl Scene

Let’s go do good things. Together.

Love, Jen

Big Dreams Have More Magic | MKE Year 3 Week 19

Dream big.

We are the Architect of our own lives. So go ahead and dream big dreams my friends. Don’t let circumstance be the handmaiden of your future. If a 5-year old can become an Astronaut or Fire Fighter, then you can certainly become anything you want as well.

If you’re unhappy in your job…find a new one. If you hate your job and live a life of misery…and you openly (or silently) complain about how miserable you are…that’s the vibration you’re sending out into the world…which means that is the exact thing you end up attracting more of. Ironic, isn’t it.

A job is not your identity – it is what you’re currently doing. A salary is simply the bribe they’re paying you to keep you from pursuing your dreams.

You don’t need a job, you need an income – so do what makes you happy and you’ll be amazed how much money you end up attracting – it’s a Universal Law!

If you can’t quite yet picture your dream, or feel like you don’t deserve the best and the happiest there is to be had…perhaps a small shift in your perception will help:

Emotions are the physical manifestations of our thoughts, so when you feel a negative thought or emotion coming on, find something else to focus on. Something seemingly meaningless…for instance, during this MKE course we are teaching our subconscious to associate shapes and colours with our most sacred desires and the thinking habits – and resulting mindset shifts necessary to become self-directed thinkers helps us reclaim the throne in our own lives.

My shape quickly became a circle. So I did a little experiment at home…in a large vase in the kitchen, I started collecting every circular thing smaller than the palm of my hand that would have otherwise been destined for the recycling bin. The sheer amount of circular objects that pass through my kitchen on a daily/weekly/monthly basis was astonishing…beer or pop cans, salsa jar lids, K-cups, salad dressing flip caps…now each time I toss one in the vase (or see one in the fridge or pantry for that matter), I remind myself of one thing I’m grateful for.

It’s to the point now that I see circles everywhere…and so am constantly reminded of gratitude and the concept of Give More Get More has become part of my DNA.

Circles, circles everywhere – and so is my Gratitude!

Driving…tail lights are nice red circles. Steering wheel and tires are too! Showering…all those bottles have round lids. Lying in bed…smoke alarms on the ceiling. Door knobs. Key rings. Feeding the dogs (their bowls and their kibble). Coins in my purse…

Training your brain is fun (hello, evolution!) and as you get more skilled at it, it becomes hard to see a vehicle as I walk up to it because all I see is my gratitude. Im not driving myself to work, rather I’m immersed in the Universal law of giving and receiving.

There’s no time to be negative and feel sorry for myself…I’m too busy showing gratitude and appreciation for all the good things in my life, and in turn, as promised, and without fail, the Universe is showering me with all kinds of favor!

In MKE week 16 we collectively focused on kindness – amazing how true it is that what we focus on expands! As Earl Nightingale said in The Strangest Secret, we become what we think about!!

It all begins and ends in your own mind. Guard it like a fortress.

Dream Big Plan Well Work Hard Smile Always.jpg

I believe we are put on this planet to accomplish our life’s purpose, and I happen to think that LOVE is a critical component to us finding that destined path. Love is the illuminator. Give up the struggle and the pain will cease. When you clear your head from the negativity you make room to breathe again, to think…to dream!

Remember this…you’ll never get what you want – you’ll only ever get what you can picture.

Put yourself first!

Think happy thoughts.

Stop thinking. Start feeling.

YES YOU CAN!

Jen 🙂

What’s Love Got To Do With It? | MKE Year 3 Week 18

My kids and I love watching good movies and listening to good music – so by natural extension, randomly dropping one-liners is kind of our thing. For instance, instead of simply announcing ‘Dinner’s ready…’, I’ll say ‘Oh, oh, oh, sweet child o’ mine…dinner’s ready’.

Oh sweet child of mine...

Mega Mind is one of our favourites, and the line ‘…and I love you, random citizen’ speaks to so much more than just a giggle from movie night…it epitomizes my mindset and is a major contributing factor to my ‘sunshine and rainbows’ world.

While my kids were growing up, my parenting style was based largely upon my understanding of unconditional love. And truthfully, having this core belief as the lodestone of my parental compass is a huge part of why they survived teenage hood 😉

Ancient-+How+does+a+Compass+work

I learned very early on that it was necessary to have a strong moral compass to keep me on the straight and narrow, in life, but also in parenting.

As a leader – which as parents we are – I strived to do my best to lead by example. Mostly because it’s the right thing to do, but also because everybody knows people won’t do what you say, they’ll do what you do.

Beginning with the end in mind I knew that unconditional love was the key. Having a long-term vision to foster independence and empathy in my kids helped me see past whatever the current struggle was. Keeping things in perspective allowed me to ‘pick my battles’ as they say…

By no means have I been awarded a medal as the Worlds’ Best Mom [though I am pretty sure it’s in the mail], however, I’ve learned a thing or two along the way that helped keep me focused.

Well rounded, magnetic humans was the end-goal, so it was equally important that they become self-directed thinkers. Deep down I knew it would click for them. Eventually.

Some of the lessons included:

Show them how to always give their best and highest effort by always giving my best and highest effort.

Redirect your best self into a positive experience-based teacher –  you’ll be setting a contagious example at the same time.

Rather than lecture about priorities and responsibilities, instil within them morals and values.

Find the good in everything.

We all live in the house, therefore, it’s everyone’s privilege to pitch in around the house.

You catch more flies with honey than vinegar.

Avoid drama by not expending negative energy into being all pissed off about this, that, or the other thing. *”Life is too shorts.” RIP Jaydon Summerfeldt*

Get done what needs to be done, calmly, and from a place of love. This will energize you, rather than drain you while having so many things on your to-do list.

Don’t cut them slack only to hold it over their heads or use it as leverage.

Don’t keep tabs or tally who owes who what because you did some thing on their behalf.

Stick to it – it’s 100% worth it!!

Acceptable: I would like, or may I please have. Not Acceptable: I want.

Above all else, Love unconditionally. Even when you don’t want to or think you can’t.

It is good to be me, and I am very blessed and highly favoured because I have decided to make the best of everything and because I choose to feel the best in everyone.

Well done is better than well said

During a recent performance review at work, my boss was explaining a 5-point self-assessment and made it very clear that he NEVER awards feedback in the Always column. As we approached the part about my attitude, he lifted his head said:

‘I know I literally just said I don’t hand out ‘Always’ ratings…however upon reviewing the attitude and presence you consistently bring to the office, anything less would have been an injustice to you. Well done.

Screen Shot 2018-02-07 at 10.20.47 AM

Sara said to me the other day that her understanding of unconditional love meant doing something for somebody even if she didn’t want to, and doing it before she would do something else for herself in its place.

I explained to her that the true meaning of unconditional love, in fact, is loving someone regardless of what they do; without an agenda or caveat, and for no other reason than because they are who they are and you are who you are.

I’ve often referenced The Eisenhower Matrix when discussing being a good friend, brother, sister, daughter, son etc. to illustrate the difference between Urgent and Important, and how it will often vary depending on who you’re talking to, based on their life experiences.

In this particular instance, Sara was faced with a challenge that was urgent to her friend and while it was important, it wasn’t urgent in her eyes, yet she allowed their-urgency to become her-urgency. As she described the situation in retrospect, the resentment was evident in her voice yet she dismissed her feelings with a shoulder shrug by saying “It’s a good thing I love him unconditionally”.

She wasn’t acting from a place of love, she was acting from a place of guilt. Unconditional love has nothing to do with making yourself available on a whim, or sacrificing your own priorities because someone else can’t get their own ducks in a row.

 

Urgent vs important - TheEisenhowerMatrix-1024x683

In my profession, we hear one saying all the time, so imagine my delight when Sara quoted it back to me at the end of our conversation…asking how it related to her challenge.

you'll never get what you want...PNG

This doesn’t only mean grandiose gestures such as donating a kidney or building homes on a Tsunami-devastated island…helping other people get what they want can even mean helping them achieve 5-extra-minutes-of-sleep or saving the day by bringing a roll of TP to the helpless, stranded person at the end of the hall.

The implementation of unconditional love comes in many forms…including, for instance…doing the dishes.

Have you ever assigned ‘dish duty’ to someone…

yet the sink magically remains full of dirty dishes?

Frustrating, right!?

Doesn’t have to be.

When you do the dishes for somebody else because they didn’t do it, you’re not doing it from a place of love, rather from a place of anger – begrudgingly sacrificing your time [and sanity] because some ass-hat didn’t do the dishes – again. There’s a difference between doing something for someone else in a selfless manner, and being a sucker.

This forces you into second place as far as your own priorities are concerned, and the inconvenience you feel is usually preceded with – or followed very quickly by – feelings of resentment, frustration and/or disappointment.

The toxicity resulting from negative emotions consumes your heart and your mind, torturing you as it resonates throughout your entire being, eventually becoming part of the energy around you, and therefore by extension, the energy or vibe of your home.

Speaking from personal experience, it’s highly unlikely that the dish-ditcher (*cough, cough, Michael*) will leap off the couch when they hear the commotion in the kitchen and race in to take over, apologies in tow. Unconditional love means loving the dish-ditchers even when they don’t do the dishes. They might not appreciate it, but the Universe does if you do it with love.

It’s not about doing the dishes for somebody because they didn’t; it’s about doing the dishes so you they can do something else.

Fundamentally, these two things are the same, at the end of the day, choosing to act with love rather than anger can sometimes mean that

– – you’re the one doing the dishes – –

…yet the feelings, thoughts and emotions you choose to associate with that particular action can’t help but manifest themselves into their physical equivalent in the form of energy, which will – without fail -reverberate throughout your life.

For better or worse.

Therefore, it’s really about doing the dishes so you can do something other than bitch about the dishes not being done.

When you act from a place of love, you set yourself free and everything becomes easier. Subconsciously, we inflict so much unnecessary pain and suffering onto ourselves and those around us. Day after day, these seemingly inconsequential decisions shape our world – stories we tell ourselves about how much we have to do, or why the kids are ungrateful, or how life has stacked the odds against us. By telling ourselves these stories – we concede to a tough life, allowing these tiny battles chip away at our souls – slowly but surely turning what is and should be a dream life, into a real-life horror story.

Simple changes to how you perceive situations…the stories you tell yourself regarding how you feel about your experiences, can and will have a dramatic impact on your life for the better.

It’s not about what did or didn’t happen.

It’s about the feeling you associated to what did or didn’t happen.

Your kids are watching. If you throw a fit about doing the dishes, what sane person would expect them not to throw a fit as well? You know that they say about Monkey’s…

Monkey See. Monkey Do.PNG

Acting from a place of servant leadership does not mean you are an actual servant in the Cinderella sense of the word, but rather, it means doing what you do, and doing it with love, regardless. Doing the dishes with love doesn’t mean you love doing the dishes.

When putting love first – even if it means doing the dishes yourself – you act from a place of love; you create the time and space in your schedule so that they can do other things, and your payback is 100-fold…this act of selfless love actually makes time and space in your heart, also!!

Giving without the expectation of reciprocity is very freeing. It’s rare that the Universe will return your efforts to you in the same form.

Instead, maybe the person ahead of you in the drive-thru will pay for your coffee.

Or smile from the next car as you wait at the light.

Or someone will hold the door open for you.

Or shovel your snow.

Or simply say Hi.

Now don’t get me wrong, you may be doing a lot of dishes in the 18+ years that they live at home, but I promise you it’s all worth it when you overhear them talking to someone about acting from a place of love, or when they act selflessly by helping someone else, or that glorious day when you come home and the dishes are actually done, and they even have a glass of wine ready for you because they recognize and appreciate that you had a long day!!

Helping other people with seemingly inconsequential tasks so they can do other things means you are opening your heart to love and by extension, it opens their heart to love as well.

Love is all that is real.

And with love all things are possible.

My wish for you my friends, is that you keep your sinks clear of dirty dishes and your hearts open to the possibility of love in all that you do. I promise you this – you’ll be glad you did!!

Love,

Jen

 

Optimists Rule The World | MKE Year 3 Week 17

Kindness, unlike Unicorns should not exist merely in our imaginations.

As an empath, thinking of others first isn’t a difficult or challenging task for me. Because my world is always Sunshine and Rainbows, it’s not hard for me to find things to be grateful for, or ways to show my appreciation to the Universe. What I’m learning, however, as I track the evolution of my thoughts – essentially, the evolution of my actual DNA – is that being kind to myself is equally, if not more important.

Be kind, for everyone is fighting a difficult battle.

-Plato

Faith vs. Belief

I’m stuck in this back-and-forth…an endless tennis match of my thoughts, torn between heart and mind – trying to decide if Faith is exclusive to Religion, or not. I don’t believe Faith has anything to do with Religion at all. Or anything not to do with it, for that matter.

Gravity. We don’t need to ‘believe’ in it Perez, for it to play a fairly significant role in our day-to-day lives…right?!!

The difficulty however, is that belief precedes the action…deciding where to place my Faith therefore, is a critical juncture to all success; to my past, present and future successes.

So, where do I want to place my Faith?

We all have equal capacity for Faith, it’s all about what you believe, and where you choose to place that belief.

When I talk about Faith, I’m not referencing Religion…while I haven’t related to Religion in a long time (…been on the short end when ‘Christians’ hide their judgement of others behind the guise of ‘Religion’), however I do relate to God…so now, I am simply…

Spiritually Optimistic…I choose to do good and be good to people, with full Faith that they will do good things – not back – but forward.

I give, wholeheartedly, without the expectation of reciprocity.

The creator doesn’t judge people until they’re at the Pearly Gates…so what makes us think we have the right to do so?

Pearly Gates Landscape

Why do we need to judge people at all? Perhaps judgement is nothing more than a fear of the loss of power? Why can’t we all just get along?

The bottom line is nobody really knows – yet it has been proven that we project our insecurities onto other people by judging them (quietly to ourselves, or verbally to others) in order to deflect our lack of self confidence.

In order to remain on the straight and narrow, I often ask myself?

Am I seeking approval? Perhaps…

…more than that though…am I seeking to avoid disapproval…

My belief is intact. Belief in my strengths, and belief that I can overcome my weaknesses. Belief in my abilities to better the world for myself and for others. My unending, optimistic belief that kindness cures all.

Be kind. Be Gentle.

Constant thoughts of gratitude are a great form of prayer.

All it takes is concentration… | MKE Year 3 Week 16

Manifest your ideal | A ‘how-to’ guide [in progress…]

I’ve worn my ability to multi-task like a badge of honour for as long as I can remember…turns out, what I thought was among my greatest strengths has actually been, perhaps, my greatest weakness.

When focusing on one thing at a time the results are astounding…the quality of work rises, and the task is actually completed faster. A recent Stanford Multi-Tasking Study found that when we multi-task we are actually less organized, retain less information and are unable to filter out distractions. Science has proven that it takes less energy to succeed than it does to fail. Imagine that!

This Quad | Far Quad visual is a pretty accurate (and entertaining) descriptor of how easy it is to get distracted…it personifies the reason why multi-tasking is a trap and how so many people can easily fall into its clutches. Also, it’s funny because it’s true.

farquad

 (Wish I knew the origin so I could give appropriate props and accolades to the genius behind this…)

Consider what your old blueprint is telling you…

Why do we continue to do things that we know are not effective?

Why do we keep running on the proverbial ‘Hamster Wheel of Life’?

Enough already.

You control your destiny…and it’s achieved by the tiny steps we take day-in-and-day-out to direct our lives down the path of our choosing.

Charles F. Hannel repeatedly teaches that “Knowledge does not apply itself”…we’ve got to make the application.

John P. Wooden says that a Dream Without a Plan is just a Fantasy.

“All it takes is concentration.” Charles F. Hannel

For all the List Makers out there, the last ‘To-do List’ you’ll ever need is: Plan the work.  Work the plan. Schedule the most important activity FIRST…literally, write it into your schedule.  Actually do the most important activity first. And be nice to yourself.

It’s simple. Focus + concentrate and STOP MULTI-TASKING. Keep distractions separate.  Let go of what you do not need. Instead, focus on the most important activity. Cling to what you do need, and manifest your ideal.

A line that sticks with me from the movie ‘The Help’ is this…

“You are smart.  You are kind.  You are important.”

 

The Hedgehog Concept | MKE Year 3 Week 15

The Hedgehog Concept

When you take care of the most important activity first, it’s amazing how easy it is to find time to do all the other stuff…the little things that are such time-gobblers.

“The fox knows many things, but the hedgehog knows one big thing.” Isaiah Berlin explored the fundamental distinction that exists between those who are fascinated by the infinite variety of things (foxes) and those who relate everything to a central, all-embracing system (hedgehogs).”

We must ask ourselves two questions…

Q1 | What am I pretending not to know?

and

Q2 | What would the person that I intend to become do next?

You know those videos that illustrate the importance of scheduling the big things in your life first, trying to visually prove that when you schedule the big stuff first, magically it all fits in?  So for this BLOG, I’m jumping past the cleverly illustrated examples of how so many people start backwards…

…and fast-forwarding instead, to illustrating the importance of scheduling – and doing – the big things first, such as making family, faith and income producing activities the priority *imagine tennis balls being put into a tennis ball sleeve*…

Secondly, a visual explanation of how it makes so much more sense to follow the most important activity with the supporting or background details *now imagine pouring rice into the sleeve and watch it fill in the space between the tennis balls*…

Next, and time permitting, allow time for the ‘other’ stuff – the minutia – such as cleaning the house, scrolling your social media feed, updating your phone, organizing cupboards etc. *imagine sand being poured into the sleeve, wiggling its way in between the tennis balls and the rice*…

As a reward for working smarter, not harder, we can then add the ‘fruits of life’ as my friend Mark J. puts it…the fun stuff, the ‘us-time’ or ‘me-time’ that we crave *finally, imagine pouring water into the sleeve…over top of the tennis balls, the rice and the sand.*

Now, stand back and marvel at how beautifully it all fits in…So why then, do we all tend to fill our days with the sand first…???

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On too many occasions, I’ve looked at my business as a reflection of myself – only to become frustrated at the fact that I’m not making the income I’d like to make, or more accurately…need to make. I get down on myself for not doing the simple tasks…the most important tasks, rather than filling my days with ‘busy work’…all the useless, time consuming, non income-producing activities, and for what? …for nothing except the ability to have an excuse to fall back on for my lack of progress in business.

It’s far easier to trick ourselves into believing we’re actually working…when in fact we are just pushing piles of stuff around on our desks, rarely accomplishing anything of value or importance.

Justifying the avoidance factor in business…and to an extent, in every day life as well, introspection has taught me that if I fear doing the activity that will bring me success – let’s say it’s telling people about my product/service despite KNOWING that I understand my product/service – upon analyzing said avoidance on a deeper level, I’ve realized that I don’t actually have a fear of sharing my business, but rather a fear of being rejected…a fear of people not taking my advice, a fear of putting myself out there and being shot down.

So this is what happens when we concentrate – the truth reveals itself. And it does truly set you free. If you’ll allow it – embrace it rather than reject it.

The avoidance on my part is not whether they do or don’t elect to become a customer, rather for some silly and strange reason, I place extreme personal success or failure based on if they deem my advice worthy or not. I’ve equated them not buying my product/service with them not valuing my opinion – instantly, I become reclusive and my desire to be recognized for creative expression gets all bent out of shape and so I simply stop asking because then I can’t possibly be rejected. Ridiculous, I know.  This is nothing but fear, and everybody knows that nothing more than F.E.A.R. is simply False Evidence Appearing Real.  

I was re-reading How to Win Friends and Influence Others yesterday and read a quote by Benjamin Franklin…

“I will speak ill of no man, and speak all the good I know of everybody.”

It takes self-control to be understanding and forgiving. Along this #LifeChanging journey of self-discovery, I began implementing the 7-day Mental Diet, making a habit of not judging others – which has helped me realize that when I was previously jumping to conclusions about people or situations, I was merely avoiding doing that very same work on myself.

When you can face your fears – which is often [sadly] ourselves – and overcome them, it is then that we discover our greatness on the other side!

I’ve begun recognizing my own self-sabotaging behaviours, and was recently introduced to a powerful resource, a book called Get off your But! by Sean Stephenson.

From the Inside Flap (via Amazon.ca):

“This book will show you how to move beyond your limitations and begin to experience and share your gifts at the highest level.. . . Read this book in its entirety, follow the lessons closely, and watch as your life transforms into a masterpiece filled with an abundance of bliss, passion, and gratitude.” —From the Foreword by Anthony Robbins

In addition to presenting Sean Stephenson’s unbelievable life story, Get Off Your “But,” offers anyone who needs to conquer fears and insecurities a hands-on guide for overcoming the forces of negativity and self-sabotage. Sean—a successful psychotherapist—shows what it takes to overcome the big bumps in the road, eliminate excuses, end insecurities, and ultimately stand up for happiness and success in life. As Sean explains, anyone can fall victim to the “Buts”:

  • “But” Fears (But what if I fail . . .)
  • “But” Insecurities (But I’m not good enough . . .)
  • “But” Excuses (But there’s no time . . .)

Get Off Your “But” offers a practical guide for putting fear behind you and building the inner resources to become self-confident at work and at home. It’s time to get off your “but” and start leading the life you dream.

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Book reviews, as per Amazon.ca:

  • “Sean is an amazing person with an important message.”
    —President Bill Clinton
  • “Sean Stephenson is the Yoda of personal development, with less pointy ears.”
    —Jimmy Kimmel, host of ABC’s Jimmy Kimmel Live
  • “As we struggle with inertia to become the best that we can be, Sean Stephenson’s book informs and inspires us to stand up and keep moving forward. Thank you, Sean, for your life, your work, and your abundant sharing.”
    —Ken Blanchard, coauthor, The One Minute Manager
  • “Sean Stephenson is a hero to me. When you read his book, he will be a hero to you as well. His moving stories about himself and others who have found the gifts in their pain will teach you so much about courage and, just as important, you will learn how to build your own sense of confidence when it comes to health, career, relationships, and more. Do yourself a favor read this book! ”
    —Susan Jeffers, Ph.D., author, Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway and Embracing Uncertainty
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Nerd Knowledge | MKE Year 3 Week 14

Remember in school, how there were all the groups, the cliques…lines were drawn and there was no fraternizing with the enemy. Labels have changed over the years, but basically there were the Cool Kids, the Book Worms (read: Nerds), the Jocks, the Rebels, the Teachers’ Pet, and the Floaters; who didn’t belong to any one group in particular; and were loosely accepted by all groups because they were neither a threat, nor an advantage.
I was a Floater.
Theatre seatingAs I observed each group hold their ground for the duration as year one morphed into year two, and year two into year three, was that their knowledge – both individually and collectively – didn’t increase with any notable significance…with the exception of the Nerds.
The Nerds were always inventing new things, learning new skills, asking for help and stretching the boundaries; applying logic from one success to the previous failure of another, and in doing so, creating an entirely new concept. After all, bread still existed before someone sliced it.

Learning was thought to be Geeky – but to the Nerds, it was always super cool.

Their ‘wins’ came from trying new techniques – and failing until they succeeded, and they celebrated the acquisition of Nerd Knowledge like it was winning the Big Game, acing a test, or being crowned Prom Queen.
If you fast forward 10-years after High School [any 10-years; any High School], the Nerds have secured their place as ruler. Bill Gates. Nicholai Tesla. Mark Zuckerberg. You get the point.
So, the way I see it, adopting some Nerd Knowledge of my own; studying with the same tenacity as the Nerds’ studied, then I too can morph into a Nerd and celebrate the slicing of my own bread!
education is our passport to the future
Introspection is one of my favorite things. Time spend in self-reflection – quietly reviewing my life – reflecting, wondering… ‘What am I Missing?‘ fills my cup. So I decided to apply this logic to figuring out how exactly to re-claim my sanity and put my Dragons to rest, once and for all. And it begins with the question I haven’t been able to answer. I need to put my Jennergy in the spotlight…and that begins with the desire to give more. In order to do that, I must first ‘Nerd-up’ my finances; abolish my bad spending habits, live within my means and conquer the infamous ghost who keeps draining my bank account.

It’s been said a time or two that money is the root of all evil. Everybody knows that’s not true. It’s the love of money that is the root of all evil.

If you’re a nice, generous, compassionate person, money won’t turn you into a giant prick, rather, it will simply accentuate your kind soul. Likewise, if you’re a giant prick…well…I’m sure you get where I’m going with this. You see, money simply accentuates that which we already are.

“Every human being who reaches the age of understanding of the purpose of money, wishes for it. Wishing will not bring riches.

But, desiring riches with a state of mind that becomes an obsession, then planning definite ways and means to acquire riches, and backing those plans with persistence which does not recognize failure, will bring riches.”

Think and Grow Rich, by Napoleon Hill, describes the method by which DESIRE for riches can be transmuted into its financial equivalent, consists of six definite, practical steps:

  1. Fix in your mind the exact amount of money you desire. It is not sufficient merely to say “I want plenty of money.” Be definite as to the amount. (There is a psychological reason for definiteness which will be described in a subsequent chapter).
  2. Determine exactly what you intend to give in return for the money you desire. (There is no such reality as “something for nothing”.)
  3. Establish a definite date when you intend to possess the money you desire.
  4. Create a definite plan for carrying out your desire, and begin at once,whether you are ready or not, to put this plan into action.
  5. Write out a clear, concise statement of the amount of money you intend toacquire, name the time limit for its acquisition, state what you intend to give in return for the money, and describe clearly the plan through which you intend to accumulate it.
  6. Read your written statement aloud, twice daily, once just before retiring at night, and once after arising in the morning. AS YOU READ – SEE AND FEEL AND BELIEVE YOURSELF ALREADY IN POSSESSION OF THE MONEY.
These subtle nuances between what we ‘think’ we know, and what actually is, shapes our perception of the world. When we can look at FACTS vs the TRUTHS we tell ourselves, we realize that our realities are nothing more than our perceptions.

Perceptions aren’t reality. Reality is reality.

Our realities are shaped by the feelings we associate (our perceptions) to the situations which we experience. When we realize this we’ve got a chance of living our true Greatness.
Knowledge is power girl

I hope and trust you are living your own Greatness and embracing your inner Nerd – I have Faith in you, I will be your Cheerleader and your Biggest Fan.

Go get your Nerd on.

YES YOU CAN!!

Thank you for taking the time to read…I look forward to your comments!

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